My Mom's Birthday, High School Sex, and a Trip to the Dean's Office, No, they aren't related.
Today would have been my mom's 60th birthday. My thoughts are with her today, and with my family, with my nieces and nephews, and with my G-d willing, future family who will never get to know her.
Today is also an odd day at school. I was so pissed off at my students for not turning in a fairly big (by my easy standards) assignment that I decided to do conferencing about grades with all those getting Ds and Fs. While talking with one boy, he's 17, he started crying. I am touched that students feel safe with me and tell me their problems and are comfortable. Though, sometimes it still baffles me. It's most definitely reaffirming to know that my students have someone advocating and there for them. No matter how much they drive me insane, I care.
After that I walked to the health center to use the restroom. As I was leaving a girl, who I don't know, walks up to me and asks, very shyly, "Miss, do they give out free condoms in there?" So, I took her in and asked the receptionist the policy on that. The student just didn't want to give her name. The policy is students fill out a simple form with their name that says they visited, but it doesn't say for what.
Now...I'm sure MANY of my readers will find this quite controversial. You know, things like, "How dare they give condoms out!", "They are supporting and ecouraging kids to have sex!", "They ought to be teaching abstinence" ...Sure, I'd love to hear your thoughts on the matter. My view is this. A teen is going to have sex once they put their mind to it. I was pleased that this young lady was being PROACTIVE and thinking ahead and protecting her and her partner. That says so much. Do I think high school kids should be having sex? No. But since I know they do and will, I'm all for providing safety mechanisms.
Update: Argh!
My next class didn't get better. It got worse! about 7 kids were tardy. Two of whom were up to about 7 tardies and both of whom I have behavior and attitude problems with. And so, I sent them to the dean. By the time that period was over, I was done. I called the office and asked them if they could get coverage for me for the rest of the day. And so, I left, and went and got a comfort pizza at a new kosher pizza place downtown. I know when I'm at my limit and I know today was one of those days where taking care of me was most important.
Of course, work wasn't over. The dean called me at home to let me know that both of the kid's parents would be coming to meet with me and the dean tomorrow morning to discuss attendance and behavior. I guess my students didn't know the dean was listening to them talk shit about me while he was on the phone. They were saying things like, "I hate Miss _____. I'm so going to go off on her tomorrow when my mom is here. She's probabally on her period and now her fiance doesn't want her". Ok, now that is actually quite funny! I mean, it's sad and irritating. I dont' need to tell you if they were boys or girls. Nor do I need to tell you what age these kids are. I think the idiocracy speaks for itself. And so, tomorrow morning, instead of prepping to teach, I'll be in the dean's office with the dean, hopefully my special ed aid who has had to pull both these kids out for behavior, and parents. Sigh...if the kids would only see I like them. I want them to succeed damnit. I don't want them to be in trouble. I dont' want their parents to come. I've talked to both these kids multiple times and extensively. They've always agreed to be cool. Trust me on this...neither have been sent out in ages and when my aid wanted to I asked her to let them slide. Maybe my ease is why they thought they could do whatever.
All I know is...most of teaching is management and today was a day I had to manage myself. Thank goodness I went home. I might have gone crazy otherwise...well, not really. I'm just glad I'm home.
posted by Tamara @ 10:00 AM
5 comments
5 Comments:
Good for you for taking care of yourself. I hope the rest of your week gets easier!
Wow, I'll never complain about my job again. I always likened managing a team of web developers like being a Kindergarten teacher. 17 year olds... No Thanks! I had a problem employee for a couple of years. I worked closely with him to get him to improve. (In this case he had substance abuse issues that was effecting the quality of his work and attendance) After a long "Performance Plan" period, I had to let him go. I was devastated that I couldn't help this guy. I stuck with him, and kept him as an employee through his jail time, Offered him anonymous counseling though our HR department and even worked out a pretty "low bar" obtainable performance plan. No luck. This guy was a 10 year employee, whose previous mgmt, always overlooked the issues because it was easier then dealing with the problem. Thank you for sticking with your issues and trying to turn things around for these kids. Sometimes an honest and frank swift kick in the pants is what folks need. Pushing folks along doesn't do anyone any good. (on either side of the fence). As for the contraceptives at school. Put me in the, "you did the right thing" camp. Better abstinence, but if that message isn't getting though... It's a better alternative to unwanted pregnancy and or disease
Tam- it sounds like you're having a bad teacher day. Isn't it amazing- when we were kids how we were so afraid of our teachers- not that we were unsafe with them, but that if we got a call from the teacher, we were the ones in trouble- now its the other way around. If we try to enforce some standards- the most simple ones: be on time, turn in your work...then WE are the ones with teh problem and by golly we'll catch hell for it from both the students and the parents. No wonder our whole society is going to the dumps. Oh well...try to hang in there and enjoy the pizza.
Yeah, sorry about the kids. The trends here are not promising on the behavior front. But it's good that you can push the 'eject' button and get out of the rest of the day as needed. That's really helpful sometimes.
Like Gruven Reuven we employed a mostly amiable drunk who gave us fits for years. He grew less amiable despite going to AA, treatments for addiction, and working a full 3 days a week for the very handsome 80K+ full time salary we paid him. He was also constantly broke, and had a shopping fetish for all sorts of things. We've had a few of these guys in our experience, but he was one of our 'best' producers. Despite having not completed his degree either. He made the tragic error of picking a fight with the wife when we were moving the office wanting to know which of the offices would be his. He was on 'probation' at the time for the arrest & subsequent 'down time' that it cost the office. He always had semi plausible excuses for missing weeks of work at a time, but that day was the last straw. Don't take a pair of deuces and raise yourself thru a hurricane!
But yeah, on condoms, I really want it included with the kids lunches. It would improve public & child health all around. At least they'd be familiar with the uses for them too. And that's a very good thing people! Cheers & Good Luck, 'VJ'
It never occurred to me that the teachers would have known which girls were putting out.
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