High School Issues
This morning when I got my school mail from the office, there was a "confidential" letter from one of my students. It's just over one page, typed, double spaced.
Last week she mentioned to me that her and the friend were not speaking and that it was really hard for her to be in class. I told her she could always come talk if she needed to and even offered to have the three of us talk at lunch so I could play mediator. So, over the weekend, she obviously thought about it and wrote the letter. She asked me for help. She shared how high school should be the best time in her life and how she is so depressed, cries herself to sleep nightly, doesn't know what to do.
I think it's so important that my readers, some of whom are parents and teachers, understand that our students have problems. They aren't quantifiable and sometimes they seem little to us, but for a student, these are BIG things. I feel blessed that there is something about me as a teacher that students feel safe with. I think it's KEY in the environment I'm working in.
posted by Tamara @ 7:54 AM
9 comments
9 Comments:
Hi, Tam
You know, the first thing that pops into my mind reading this post is wow this girl has her act together. I think it's amazing that someone is self-aware enough to realize that there's a problem, and even have a sense of what is causing it. On top of that she's actively contacting you to come up with solutions, albeit maybe not the best solution. I wasn't even that self-aware in my late 20s, and so I think it's amazing, not to mention probably quite flattering for you in that she's sees you as a trustable confidant.
Also, just so you know, I feel so awkward posting on your blog now, I feel like a ridiculous little kid.
Tikkun: You're silly. No awkwardness at all. Heck, this is how we connected to begin with--inspired, intellectual, and thought provoking talks. Trust me, that part of this won't ever end. :)
I'm thrilled to be the first person to say hooray for you!!!
So many teachers allow their students troubles to float safely under their radars but you don't. You're there for them and that makes them lucky and you one fantastic teacher!
I know from my teenagers, that their issues are all encompassing and seem unsolvable. To give them the gift of your time is the most valuable gift ever!
Kasamba, thanks. As a teacher, I speak for many and we love appreciation. It comes far and few times.
um-hum i c
Nani-that's why I love you and you're my teacher bud! And congrats that you are the type of teacher that kids come to. Maybe it's a Jewish woman thing.
I think that's awesome that the kids feel that they can go to you. High School can be so much fun, yet so hard for so many. This incident is exactly the reason why I would love to become a teacher. I bet you're an incredible teacher!! You certainly sound it.
Amishav--Thanks, I hope it lasts a long time. I look pretty darn young, definitely don't look 33. I act it most of the time ;) Anyway, I love that I'm not out of touch. I don't listen to their music and I think much of what they do is gross, but I'm not out of touch. It's my gift :D
I really do think it's an age thing first probably. You don't often see these same kids sneaking up on 'ol Ms. Crabapple with these issues. "Why in my day you simply 'went away' for awhile dearie, think of it as an extended vacation..."
HS is miserable for many kids for any number of reasons. Lots of kids just never fit in, or were never flamboyant enough to get much notice. For many others, their small 'clique' may be the only real caring family they've got at the moment. I vividly remember siting idly by while classmates went on and on about the latest TV show. Then as now, this did not interest me much. This was to be repeated with surprising frequency for the next decades...
I recall arguing with a HS teacher about the ABM treaty, and mentioned the limited sites we had for these missiles. He was clueless & incredulous on the point, and there had yet to be a Wikipedia invented to settle the dispute. No one knew what the hell I was talking about, and all I did was read the daily paper on a more regular basis.
Again, then as now, it's often the secret to success in a dumbed down world. (Then the papers got dumbed down to meet their audience, but that's another, much longer rant. See the archives of thedailyhower.com for a taste of what it might look like).
Empathy counts for a lot, but looking a bit younger in these circumstances perhaps a bit more. I guess that's the bottom line. And that even if your HS experience was uniformly miserable (or nearly so), you can go on to have a very successful life & career despite this slight impediment. Cheers, 'VJ'
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