UPDATES
"Jane"
Mr.____ came by my class today and read the letter Jane gave me. He informed me that he knows her, her brother, and the family situation quite well. He thought some legal action had been taken in the past. He did not know about the hitting with cords and stuff but did give me good advice. Also, he was suprised at her ability to communicate with me; that in their interactions, she seems to struggle. He suggested I talk with her, girl to girl, and explain that sometimes scars can be infectious; that if she had severe scars she may want to have them looked at. Additionally, he suggested that I mention how there are a lot of things we can do to lighten or get rid of scars. I mentioned it to her in a very sensitive way. I told her that it's important for her to love herself. That when she looks at the mirror, there is a smile smiling back at her. I dicussed in more detail and told her there are cremes and such that if she is curious about, Mr. ____ said to come speak with him. Oh, she had spoken with Mr.____ earlier in the day. So...I feel as good about this situation as I can. I feel good how I handled it. She did have one other concern and that's the fact that her dad, brother and sister are going out of the country. She's not real pleased being home with her mom, 19 year old sister with a 2 month old baby. She compared home to prison, her room being the cell, her parents are the wardens. Her words. So, since she needs community service hours to graduate, I suggested she arrange to work on those hours for the ten days while her dad is gone. This way she's not stuck at home (since we'll be out of school at that time). Anyway...the situation is being managed.
CAT:
Reebok is not congested anymore. She still seems to be breathing and working harder to breathe than ever. Her litte heart is still racing. She is also meowing ALOT. I can't figure out if she's crying or just talking. Earlier she took a swat at the pattern on my skirt. Not in a playful way. I think she's showing true signs of an elderly cat. It's sad, but I know her time is nearing. I hope it changes, but I'm pretty sure. She does purr, so I figure she isn't totally miserable. She lets me give her her 2 pills and liquid medicine. Which must taste horrid to her since it smells like pink bubblegum. :)
posted by Tamara @ 5:09 PM
1 comments
1 Comments:
I thought someone might be familiar with 'Jane's' home situation. That's a rather classic description of what a troubled home sounds and feels like from the inside. Many kids are either unable or unwilling to describe it in such vivid detail.
I imagine the stuff that she's being attacked with are somewhat less likely to leave scars, which is why they are specifically chosen (cords being most infamous here).
It's really important that she's getting the support she needs at school that she can not derive at home. You don't know how valuable that can be to a child in this type of environment. She needs an adult, responsible & trustworthy support system or mentor(s) that can be willing to step up and see that she's not falling through the cracks. It's so easy to see these kids just slip away into trouble with less than helpful friends, all for that desperate need and want of approval or belonging.
Jane's a perfect kid for lots of deep and wide reading to let her expand her horizons and escape the present unpleasant, vulgar and violent realities that stalk her at home. My guess is that she already knows this and is a voracious reader, even if her grades might not show this.
It's always heartbreaking to realize that you can not save the world, but on occasion you can help repair a small piece of it. That's part of what teaching is all about. It's a tough job, and it's not for sissies. If at the end of the term your heart has not been broken several times, you're either in a really high priced academy full of privileged inbred common nit wits, or the odds that year gave the honors to others. It's just amazingly common, and it may not even be the most tragic or disturbing situation you face in a year either. (That would be being dragged into court due to giving the privileged inbred nit wits low grades for poor performance, or daring to write them up for their misbehavior).
Sorry about the cat too. 17 years is a very long time indeed. Take notes, it'll come in useful for mapping out expectations when your husband or SO goes old and barmy. It sounds all so familiar somehow.
Cheers & Good Luck! 'VJ'
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